John Lennon: “Imagine”

What a peaceful, uplifting song about love and unity, bringing us all together to celebrate what—

Imagine there’s no heaven.

Whoa.  Alienating a whole demographic right off the bat.

Are you sure that’s how you want to start this?

Christmas Songs

It’s a peculiar phenomenon.  No other holiday or time of year has received as much attention from the music industry in this part of the world.  That could be a direct result of Christmas being the most commercialized and most profitable holiday in the country, but as to the quality of the songs themselves, they don’t deserve any blanket generalizations.  Some are annoying, some are okay, and some are quite nice, although why they seem so heavily stuck in the mid-twentieth century is a question for someone else.

However, in seeking to stir up winter merriment, some of them become unintentionally laughable or unpleasant.  In no particular order, here are a few Christmas lyrics that are more troubling than uplifting, to put you in that good ol’ critical thinking and melancholy disillusionment kind of mood for the holidays.